Friday, October 1, 2010

Wall Street 2 - Electric Snoozaroo....

      Ana and I went to see Wall Street 2:The Dollar Ain't What It Once Was last night at the Cinemark Theater located in the shopping mall next door. It was the only English film playing that we hadn't already seen or involved fighting a Resident Evil.
Makes me want to watch the Godfather

     First though we saw trailers and while I won't get into the Brazilian movie trailers because I couldn't understand them, there was a trailer for Unstoppable starring Denzel Washington and Chris Pine. I would like announce right here and now that I think I might have found the biggest comedy hit of the year. I haven't laughed out loud during a movie trailer in such a long time, this could possibly be the silliest idea for a movie that I have ever seen. I might have missed some clues as how the movie was supposed to be a suspenseful thriller because the trailer was cut together by a meth addicted, espresso drinking rabid monkey. I thought it was so ludicrous that I started laughing again in the end credits for Wall Street. Maybe I was just trying to take the pain away from the feature presentation.

Unstoppable

     About WS2; let me start out by saying that I think Shia LeBouf is the Ben Affleck of his day. You place him next to Michael Douglas and you see this loud and clear. Douglas is Gordon Gekko, LePoff is "look mommy, I'm acting, I'm a man". The sad part is we are stuck with LePoff through most of the movie and only get a glimpse of the more interesting Gekko occasionally which kind of sucks. 

• Shia LeBouf is no Charlie Sheen all he has is talk normal to show normal and fast and loud to show anger, fear, sadness, gas pain and anal itch.
• His girlfriend has 100 million locked up in a trust fund in Switzerland, we learn this halfway through the movie and she says she planned on donating it to a charity. Only someone that has never been poor or middle class could ever think like that, especially someone that lives in NYC one of the most expensive cities in the world. LAME
• Oliver tries to put a message in the movie but it is really lost on shitty acting, too many plots that lead nowhere, an unrealistic sentimental ending 
• CGI effects that are there for no real reason but to say LOOK AT ME, LOOK AT ME
• Who am I supposed to care about in this movie? Gordon Gekko the man who steal loves only money (till the end). Shia LePuff who in the first ten minutes gets a bonus check for $1.5 million? His whiny unattractive girlfriend that works for a non-profit? Why do I care?

     You can't make a movie decrying unfettered greed that's only aim is too make as much money as possible. Why else would it get a world wide release everywhere on the same day unless they knew that word of mouth would probably kill it in two weeks. Not that it matters here in Brazil the line for Resident Evil 4 was standing outside the theater, Wall Street 2 was rather spacious for a Friday night. The best thing that could happen to Oliver Stone is if someone cut his budget in half and force him to return to his roots of Platoon or Salvador instead of giving him shit piles of money hoping to get the next JFK or Nixon. 


1 comment:

  1. Thanks for the review. Since I don't have 100 million locked up in Switzerland and the economy sucks more today than it did yesterday I have to wisely spend my hard earned $$$. I don't want to waste it on some ridiculous movie with a message that actually negates it's own message by merely existing...

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