Friday, October 28, 2011

Fear and Loathing in Puerto Rico

    Being a rabid Hunter S. Thompson fan for I guess more than almost two decades I just had to check out the new movie "The Rum Diary" starring Johnny Depp.
The Rum Diary

    The Rum Diary is the only work of fiction that Hunter ever published and it happened almost 40 years after it was written to quote the author "because it wasn't any good". I guess he dusted it off in the 90's and rewrote it some and now we have a movie that is loosely based on the source. The book isn't the best ever written and I'm not going to lie and say the movie is either but it is well worth a look. I think the movie is more about Hunter S Thompson than the fictional character in the novel Paul Kemp. There are eerie ghosts here and there of the man with lines such as "the American dream is just a piss puddle of greed" and of course "I smell bastards" shout of Hunter not Kemp. 

Thursday, September 22, 2011

The Guard...

....or how you have to watch movies from another country to be entertained.

     When I was moving to Houston in July of 2011 I listened to a lot of NPR on the 14 hour drive down from Kentucky. I like NPR for the most part though and that is good seeing that my CD player went out about 3 years ago. I have heard about more music and books by listening to NPR than just about any other source. Sure you can read reviews for movies on the IMDB but like everything on the internet you get just arguments over opinion. That and I find the message boards seem to be rampant with teenage twits that think Twilight and Transformers are the most awesomest movies ever and can't understand a movie like Another Year in which the cast was "full of ugly people".
    Anyway, I was listening to NPR in Arkansas and I heard an interview with Brenden Gleeson the Irish actor in such movies such as Braveheart, 28 Days Later, Harry Potter and In Bruges. They were discussing his latest movie with Don Cheadle called The Guard, set in Ireland and his role. The entire I am thinking this sounds like such a great movie I will never get a chance to see it. I was thinking like I still lived in little old Kentucky not moving to the 3rd Largest city in America.

     I actually got to see a cool movie. I finally paid money to watch a movie and wasn't disappointed afterwards. Thank you Sweet Jesus. I could go into all the details of what makes this movie work, the humor, the characters, the scenery but you don't have to take my word for it.

Friday, August 5, 2011

Captain America:The Last of my Patience

or Captain America:Filmed Exclusively at Shepperton Studios London, UK.

      First let me start off by saying that as a child and a teenage I loved movies. It was always such an interesting medium, visuals and sounds, plots and ideas, music and emotions. I good movie can illicit an emotional response. It can make you laugh, cry or get you angered. It was an experience when I was a kid to sit in the dark waiting for the kid in the booth to flip the switch on the projector and watch MAGIC come from light and sound. Those days are gone sadly I am afraid now it is cookie cutter movies feeding off pop culture as far back as anyone can remember. You can't just sit in the cool darkness alone with your thoughts or talking to your friend or girl anymore now you have to have COMMERCIALS SHOT at your head until the movie begin and even when the projector starts you have to watch TRAILERS for at least 15 minutes.
      Shit, I miss just getting asked to buy a coke or popcorn but I had to sit through ads for new ABC shows. One was about PAN AM Stewardesses during the early 60's when you used to have to wear a coat and tie to fly plus have a shit ton of money as well I imagine. How is that going to be a TV series? How many seasons can that last? Until Pan Am goes out of business? The Early 60's is the thing now thanks to Mad Men so why not a series about Stewardess, I'm sure they have as much of a story to tell as Madison Avenue Ad Men. I think the difference is Mad Men is on cable they have really been pushing the edge in TV like HBO the last few years with things like Rescue Me, Mad Men, Louie and Breaking Bad. ABC is owned by Disney, I doubt if the Mouse is going to get to risque.
     Then there was a commercial for the NEW Charlies Angels TV series set in Miami like it matters. This time the Angels are Detectives and Bosley isn't just some alcoholic that helps ever so often but a ladies man so plenty of sex appeal for everyone that watches. I will not be one of those watchers.
      Then,( yes I am using another THEN) there was a commercial asking if your computer had to load in seconds could it. They demonstrated by have a laptop connected to a laptop in free fall, when the OS was loaded the DVD tray would open triggering the chute and the PC would gently land on terra firma. I get it, idea is in my head. I understand commercial what you are saying are those few seconds while I get a cup of coffee at starbucks are important, THIS IS AMERICA. LAND OF THE NOW! Why those seconds that it takes for my PC to load keeps me from vital information such as funny tweets, stupid facebook messages that end in "if you aren't a coward or you are a true friend you will repost" and pictures of kids that I don't care about and don't care to see.
     So I sat through that 30 second commercial and what comes next but a fucking behind the scenes on the making of the commercial. Are you kidding me? Who cares how they made the commercial? Seriously. You strap a parachute onto a laptop and threw it out of a plane, stop me if you ALREADY FIGURED THAT OUT! Why did they make a behind the scenes for a commercial? Is it for when the DVD comes out? Will they have an audio commentary as well?
     You see, they got you in the theater because you can't leave at all. You have to get there early enough to get a seat that isn't in the front row or off to the far corners so you are at least stuck 10-15 minutes. This is made worse if you go by yourself because you can't talk away the Violent Eyeball Injections on Screen. Texting is only good for your unemployed friends and who wants to talk in a crowded theater on a cell.
      You must not leave your chair and no matter where you do set, management will provide a 6 year old boy to sit behind you to kick your seat and ask stupid questions throughout the movie. Thank you. The only highlight I can think of before the movie started was a preview for a Mexican movies called "Saving Private Perez" that looked both cheap and funny. After that it was back to anger.

Craptain Americano!

   So quick movie review. First half good, second half filler and let's just get to the fucking Avengers Movie already. A movie in which Robert Downey is going to steal the entire show because he is the most likable and charismatic of all the proposed characters. Sorry but that is about the truth of it all, Thor is going to stand their looking pissed, Cap will be flexing and Tony Stark will be drinking a martini looking suave.

Monday, June 13, 2011

Missed Connection

Dear 30-40yo Rotund Man who was in the Evansville Barnes and Noble Bathroom Saturday June 11, 2011,

Please seek help for whatever ailment that you suffer from because I don't think  it is natural to leave a bathroom stall wheezing like you have just ran The Boston Marathon. Of course upon entering said stall maybe it was just your lungs trying to pull in some much needed oxygen like a fish out of water. From the looks of what was splattered on the back of the bowl I would suggest you to start removing the husks from your corn on the cob like most civilized people have been doing for at over a thousand years. We all can't wait to remove the wrapper from that corny goodness but one must all the same. 

As a side note to Barnes and Noble, you might think you are saving money by replacing the toilet paper with single-ply wax paper but rest assured I just used 23x as much to get my asshole squeaky clean. If you are willing to spend money to put a new Nook Kiosk in the entrance of every store with some poor schmuck trying to pawn one off on customers as soon as they enter the least you can do is spend the extra .78 cents on toilet paper.  Shitting is inevitable; buying electronics that will be out dated as soon as you leave the store is not. Plus seeing that you have a Starbucks in each store and coffee being a natural laxative I would assume you'd put two and two together.

In other news looks like I am back to writing.